The Mysterious Case of the Marshmallow Stealing Pets…


One of the cutest things you could ever see is a fluffy bunny playing Fluffy Bunny… with fluffy bunnies.

This enlightening thought is brought to you after hearing that there has been a spate of marshmallow thefts from sweet toothed pets. 😀

When I read the headline on the Huffington Post twitter feed, that was my immediate reaction; how great a thing would that be!? For those of you who don’t know by the way, (though you really should, no childhood sleepover is ever going to be a truly valuable recollection if at least one of them is not tainted by that sickly feeling one gets when stuffed to the ears with marshmallows…) Fluffy Bunny is a game where, one by one, each participant puts a marshmallow in their mouth and says “Fluffy Bunny“, adding one every time without chewing, making the process gradually more difficult. The only rule is that you cannot swallow or chew them one they are in there (surprisingly easy to do once they have plugged your jaw so much can’t chew anyway, even if you wanted to) and the winner is the last fair attempt made.

The result is almost always that someone projectiles a mildly soggy, kinda fluffy mess onto a clean carpet to a mixture of “eeeeews” and “hahahahahahas”.

Anyway, the though gave me a bit of a laugh considering I have actually seen a bunny eating a marshmallow and it is indeed as adorable as it sounds.

The best example I have seen of an animal devouring a sweet treat it probably shouldn’t be though has to be from a time I went to London with a couple of friends. We were chillin’ in the Park, having just walked down the Mall and taken the obligatory tourist shots of the Palace. It was a beautiful day, sun warm on our unaclimatised Scottish faces and early morning strollers out in force. However, they weren’t the only ones out in their dozens; there was what can only be called a legion of squirrels!!

They were bold little buggers as well, coming right up to us. A few hemmed us in as if they too knew, just like Spanish street vendors, they could sense it – tourists!

I think it was the lure of sweets that brought one such hungry creature up to me. We were sitting on a bench when it scampered near me. Oooooh, i thought, look at that – a cute little squirrel. Then it got a little closer. And closer. And then- ohmijeezus that thing is on my knee! Wtf, that thing is actually sitting on my knee, what the hell do I do!!??!?

So we did the only thing we could think to do – started trying to feed it Bacon Rashers.

I think it might have been a vegetarian though because it rejected those efforts. It kept scraping at my hand though, with it’s disturbingly humanistic little paws! Then we realised what it was after. Apparently, good folk, squirrels are of a more refined character, and prefer their snacks in the form of Minstrels.

That’s right, I have sat in London, squirrel (who we affectionately named Viv) on lap, watching as it chowed down on a Minstrel, clutching it adorably in two paws and even licking off the chocolate when it melted onto then near the end. We gave Viv a carry out, she took two with her.

I wasn not such a fan a few days later when a peculiar rash appeared on the back of my hand. I called it squaids… (squirrel = aids = squaids. Obviously…)

SSDD

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